Should I Move out?
- Thread starter MC#4
- Start date
I agree with what majority of the people have said here, and that is to stay at home... I had to move out when I was 21 (not that I didnt get along, but thats another story)... anyways... I'm 26 now and if i had the option back then to stay at home, I would have only cos you save a ton of money. You dont have to worry about rent, power, food, and any other random expenses.
I was paying $650 for my first apartment + utilities etc, My monthly costs would easily come to 1100... I was lucky enough to get a good job and I saved enough money to buy a condo now....
The only advice i would suggest is to put at least 10% of your current paycheck in savings... more if you can do it. Thats what helped me put aside the money for a ring when I got married, money for the house etc! There will be some point where you'll need to dip savings... make sure you have some then...
Oh.. and another thing... Building credit was not easy for me, since I moved here in 2004 from India. So i had nothing to go off of. The only way I built credit was to get a cell phone connection and show a monthly payment... job which showed bank account with constant cash flow... and finally i opened a credit card with a $200 limit on which I would charge everything and pay off immediately and not carry a balance! I dont believe that credit should not be used at all... it should be used... but carefully and wisely!
I was paying $650 for my first apartment + utilities etc, My monthly costs would easily come to 1100... I was lucky enough to get a good job and I saved enough money to buy a condo now....
The only advice i would suggest is to put at least 10% of your current paycheck in savings... more if you can do it. Thats what helped me put aside the money for a ring when I got married, money for the house etc! There will be some point where you'll need to dip savings... make sure you have some then...
Oh.. and another thing... Building credit was not easy for me, since I moved here in 2004 from India. So i had nothing to go off of. The only way I built credit was to get a cell phone connection and show a monthly payment... job which showed bank account with constant cash flow... and finally i opened a credit card with a $200 limit on which I would charge everything and pay off immediately and not carry a balance! I dont believe that credit should not be used at all... it should be used... but carefully and wisely!
I put 90% of my pay into savings now. Have been for a while now. It's money I have that I don't use, and don't really plan to use. It's the closest thing to savings I know. The 10% I use is for gas and vehicle insurance so I can get to work.
I'm 22 and in a similar situation. The only difference is I dont have two jobs just one really small part time. My honest advice is find something you like to do and get certified + stay at home. If you don't want straight up college go to a trade school.
Right now I could be working and quitting school while pulling 1200$ a week, but I'm going to school and finishing my Electrical Engineering degree.
I spent all my social life in High school and got myself a FAA airframe and powerplant certificate to fix aircraft, and that's how I could be making 1200 a week , working like a 60-70 hours. It took me approximately 4000 hours during the course of 5 years, but I did it.
The problem is I can do it now but how about when I'm 50? Do I want to be sweating, bleeding, freezing, braving the elements? Nah, I want more for myself! You're off to a really good start though!
Oh, I suggest you do start on your credit. Star a loan on something you'd be able to pay and take a year to pay it off. It never hurts to have good credit
Right now I could be working and quitting school while pulling 1200$ a week, but I'm going to school and finishing my Electrical Engineering degree.
I spent all my social life in High school and got myself a FAA airframe and powerplant certificate to fix aircraft, and that's how I could be making 1200 a week , working like a 60-70 hours. It took me approximately 4000 hours during the course of 5 years, but I did it.
The problem is I can do it now but how about when I'm 50? Do I want to be sweating, bleeding, freezing, braving the elements? Nah, I want more for myself! You're off to a really good start though!
Oh, I suggest you do start on your credit. Star a loan on something you'd be able to pay and take a year to pay it off. It never hurts to have good credit
Parcho
New Member
Stay at home. It's natural to feel like you want to set out on your own, but do it when you need to. Especially if you have no problems living there currently and are hardly ever there besides to sleep.
Just keep this in mind, Sh*t happens. When I was 21, I had a heart attack out of the blue and set me back $44,000. No family history or drug use, I was in good physical shape too. Your 11,000 won't last you to many of life's "oh sh*t" moments that you will get.
Build that savings and never spend it all.
Just keep this in mind, Sh*t happens. When I was 21, I had a heart attack out of the blue and set me back $44,000. No family history or drug use, I was in good physical shape too. Your 11,000 won't last you to many of life's "oh sh*t" moments that you will get.
Build that savings and never spend it all.
I didn't give a whole lot of backround because I didn't want to write a novel for the op. I went to vo-tech and trained to be an auto tech. My dad and I built our own shop from the ground up. We literally took a year of every night and weekend constructing the building, pouring the floor, furnishing it with equipment etc. etc. etc. He footed the bill, and I run the place on like a commission. No work in, No pay out. I've been running it for just over 2 years. Lemme tell ya, starting from the ground up, dealing with all the bullshit, and trying to make a living off it is not easy.
I think it's finally coming into its own though. Last week was the single most profitable week we've had. We have a decent customer base, and the dead periods are getting less and less. My plan is to work the 2nd job until I can make a decent wage working on cars and then devote my time to the shop. I'm not a fan of college and have no plans to ever attend one. I want to grow the shop and expand and maybe in 20 years, I won't be the grease monkey anymore, I'll be tellin the grease monkey(s) what to do ya know.
This is really the reason I'm still living with my parents. The shop is in walking distance to the house, and I figured how cool would it be to kickstart my entrpreneurial spirit than to open the shop at 19 years old. I was workin at a garage taking home $1200 a month but I quit it to start my own. My first year I made about $5000, that's 50 hours a week min. + dealing with all the crap, like going LLC, heating the place with firewood, maintaining the place, making advertising etc. etc. I also worked many a night and weekend, even a few sundays. We did all the crap work that the other garages wouldn't touch.
I want to thank everyone that is posting on the subject. If I don't reply directly to your post, I'm sorry, but there are a lot of responses. Do know that I read every post at least twice and I'm taking this info to heart.
I think it's finally coming into its own though. Last week was the single most profitable week we've had. We have a decent customer base, and the dead periods are getting less and less. My plan is to work the 2nd job until I can make a decent wage working on cars and then devote my time to the shop. I'm not a fan of college and have no plans to ever attend one. I want to grow the shop and expand and maybe in 20 years, I won't be the grease monkey anymore, I'll be tellin the grease monkey(s) what to do ya know.
This is really the reason I'm still living with my parents. The shop is in walking distance to the house, and I figured how cool would it be to kickstart my entrpreneurial spirit than to open the shop at 19 years old. I was workin at a garage taking home $1200 a month but I quit it to start my own. My first year I made about $5000, that's 50 hours a week min. + dealing with all the crap, like going LLC, heating the place with firewood, maintaining the place, making advertising etc. etc. I also worked many a night and weekend, even a few sundays. We did all the crap work that the other garages wouldn't touch.
I want to thank everyone that is posting on the subject. If I don't reply directly to your post, I'm sorry, but there are a lot of responses. Do know that I read every post at least twice and I'm taking this info to heart.
Wow, that's messed up Parcho. I can't imagine having a heart attack at my age. I feel like most 21 year olds I guess. Totally indestructable, prime of my life, no illness, no disease, nothing can touch me. I guess in the back of my mind I know life sure does have a sick sense of humor sometimes though...
I'm not telling you what you should or shouldn't do, that is for you alone to decide. But most of the folks telling you to stay at home are basing it off the money aspect alone. Here is a counterpoint to consider:
The life experience you AREN'T getting by living at home in the safety net ca't be expressed in dollars. Will moving out be a struggle? Maybe. But the experience you gain might well be worth it. If you wait until you're "set", you might be waiting a while, and you won't be learning a lot of hugely valuable life lessons right now. Struggling is not a bad thing. It builds character and teaches you a lot about yourself.
Food for thought.
I was out in the world at 18. I went through some really tight times. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. And I'd rather be my own man, and own my own destiny and fail than be dependent and comfortable.
The life experience you AREN'T getting by living at home in the safety net ca't be expressed in dollars. Will moving out be a struggle? Maybe. But the experience you gain might well be worth it. If you wait until you're "set", you might be waiting a while, and you won't be learning a lot of hugely valuable life lessons right now. Struggling is not a bad thing. It builds character and teaches you a lot about yourself.
Food for thought.
I was out in the world at 18. I went through some really tight times. But I wouldn't trade it for the world. And I'd rather be my own man, and own my own destiny and fail than be dependent and comfortable.
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I agree with that... it definitely was not easy moving out.. and i learned a lot of things that I probably wouldnt have if I was staying at home... but I'm lucky that I came out ok.... If had gone broke and had to move out... then I would probably be sulking about the experience than thinking of it as a good thing...
finished it
Im my history in the car business I see alot of people who have good credit but the lack there of. The BEST way to get and build credit is actually different then what most think. Most financial advisors will tell you to go get a credit card and pay it off each month and your golden. Wrong...the reason is banks look for ESTABLISHED credit. They look for four "Stips" A. Phone bill B.) Utility bill C.) Salary/monthly income[minimum of two years] D.) Usable line of credit not in use. Now the fourth one is the one most people dont understand. This is not your standard credit card. This is an actual line of credit a bank can give you, which is basically an open account which you can give and take from at any point in time. Using this in good faith and paying it back monthly will generate hgher credit scores MUCH faster than a credit card. The reason is the bank has evaluated the risk... and is basically handing you an open check book. This is direct, where credit cards have a third party negative factor. If you want to build your credit, and do it fast and effectively go get a thousand dollar line of credit with a bank you have an established relationship with where you bank. If they ask you why you want it when you have $11000 between checkings and savings, tell them you just are doing it to aid your credit and do not want the interest rate factor of a credit card. If they will do more than 1k...do it, this doesnt reflect negative on your credit bureau, where as an inactive credit card does, and freshly closed credit accounts are negative as well.
Im my history in the car business I see alot of people who have good credit but the lack there of. The BEST way to get and build credit is actually different then what most think. Most financial advisors will tell you to go get a credit card and pay it off each month and your golden. Wrong...the reason is banks look for ESTABLISHED credit. They look for four "Stips" A. Phone bill B.) Utility bill C.) Salary/monthly income[minimum of two years] D.) Usable line of credit not in use. Now the fourth one is the one most people dont understand. This is not your standard credit card. This is an actual line of credit a bank can give you, which is basically an open account which you can give and take from at any point in time. Using this in good faith and paying it back monthly will generate hgher credit scores MUCH faster than a credit card. The reason is the bank has evaluated the risk... and is basically handing you an open check book. This is direct, where credit cards have a third party negative factor. If you want to build your credit, and do it fast and effectively go get a thousand dollar line of credit with a bank you have an established relationship with where you bank. If they ask you why you want it when you have $11000 between checkings and savings, tell them you just are doing it to aid your credit and do not want the interest rate factor of a credit card. If they will do more than 1k...do it, this doesnt reflect negative on your credit bureau, where as an inactive credit card does, and freshly closed credit accounts are negative as well.
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Wow. A lot going on there. I’d start off by saying staying at home after 18 does take a bit away from a person. Wrap it around anything you want, it boils down to feeling proud of yourself. If you feel like a loser for still being at home, I agree. Loser. Feel that way. Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t stay there, what it means is that your internal self worth and belief in yourself is higher than leaching off your parents. If you don’t feel that way, then your screwed for life, because you are missing that “drive” to be more than what you are. The desire to want to stand on your own. That said, sounds like your mind is in the right place, motivated properly to stand on your own, otherwise you wouldn’t be asking.
How long you stay at home depends on where you want to go and making the best plan to get there. As for owning your own business and building it, I know lots of people that do that. What you quickly find out is that you will be the worse boss you could ever possibly have. If you think having someone tell you to “go change the oil in the car or else” is bad, wait till you are looking at your books and trying to make ends meet. THAT is bitch of a boss and you are the one person that doesn’t get to take the day off. Ever. Before you think about moving out, getting a house and so forth, you need to find a path that will allow you to do that without I being a struggle all your life. I think looking 10-20 years down the road for the business to grow isn’t a good thing. If you are going to run you company, run it like any other business. Make a 3 year plan to profitability (that means paying yourself what an owner should get and still having cash left over). If you can’t do that, you need to find another plan. Only after you have a plan like this in place and know that you can build on something, can you then say “Move out, get a house, get a girl….”.
I started as an entry level IT person out of the National Guard when I was 19. I’ve made as much as 186k in one year working my way to the top. I run a side business (I too am a bitch of a boss, like all self owners) as well. Nothing I have today I would have if I hadn’t made a plan of where I wanted to be in 3 year increments. IT Tech guy. Done. Supervisor by 3 years. Done. IT Manager by 3 years and so forth. If I couldn’t find something to accomplish in 3 years, I would change my plan. With what you make now and even what you might be making in 10 years, it’s not going to be easy for you in the long run.
I’m guessing you have the desire to get here, otherwise you wouldn’t be doing the business you are. Unless you are in the business because it’s ‘comfortable’ work. My wife tells me her job (stay at home mom) is difficult. I try to remind her that her job isn’t difficult, but time consuming (hard work). There is a difference. Some people stick to doing hard work that isn’t difficult to them (familiar work) rather than take on something they are unfamiliar with or have to struggle to understand or to learn. Don’t ever fall into the trap of accepting familiar “hard” work for unfamiliar “difficult” work. It’s the challenge of change and growth where we move ourselves to the next level
How long you stay at home depends on where you want to go and making the best plan to get there. As for owning your own business and building it, I know lots of people that do that. What you quickly find out is that you will be the worse boss you could ever possibly have. If you think having someone tell you to “go change the oil in the car or else” is bad, wait till you are looking at your books and trying to make ends meet. THAT is bitch of a boss and you are the one person that doesn’t get to take the day off. Ever. Before you think about moving out, getting a house and so forth, you need to find a path that will allow you to do that without I being a struggle all your life. I think looking 10-20 years down the road for the business to grow isn’t a good thing. If you are going to run you company, run it like any other business. Make a 3 year plan to profitability (that means paying yourself what an owner should get and still having cash left over). If you can’t do that, you need to find another plan. Only after you have a plan like this in place and know that you can build on something, can you then say “Move out, get a house, get a girl….”.
I started as an entry level IT person out of the National Guard when I was 19. I’ve made as much as 186k in one year working my way to the top. I run a side business (I too am a bitch of a boss, like all self owners) as well. Nothing I have today I would have if I hadn’t made a plan of where I wanted to be in 3 year increments. IT Tech guy. Done. Supervisor by 3 years. Done. IT Manager by 3 years and so forth. If I couldn’t find something to accomplish in 3 years, I would change my plan. With what you make now and even what you might be making in 10 years, it’s not going to be easy for you in the long run.
I’m guessing you have the desire to get here, otherwise you wouldn’t be doing the business you are. Unless you are in the business because it’s ‘comfortable’ work. My wife tells me her job (stay at home mom) is difficult. I try to remind her that her job isn’t difficult, but time consuming (hard work). There is a difference. Some people stick to doing hard work that isn’t difficult to them (familiar work) rather than take on something they are unfamiliar with or have to struggle to understand or to learn. Don’t ever fall into the trap of accepting familiar “hard” work for unfamiliar “difficult” work. It’s the challenge of change and growth where we move ourselves to the next level
My first advice would be to go to a credit union and open a checking and savings account. They're lending criteria are more relaxed when you are a member so you can probably get a credit card through them within a month of opening your account (saying that without knowing all of your details). You'll also get better rates for car loans, mortgages down the road.
Lastly, I'm 34, have a wife and child, and would love to move back in with my parents for the mortgage savings alone. However, I travelled the world on my own from age 10-14, moved out for college and never came back so I've gotten the freedom thing out of my system. You'll never relate to wanting to move back in for the savings until you've experienced the financial hardships so I can't really tell you what to do. You stay, you save but miss out on independence. You leave, obviously it's vice versa.
I don't know that I've known many 21 year olds (let alone 34 year olds) who are debt free and have savings so either way, I think you'll do just fine.
Lastly, I'm 34, have a wife and child, and would love to move back in with my parents for the mortgage savings alone. However, I travelled the world on my own from age 10-14, moved out for college and never came back so I've gotten the freedom thing out of my system. You'll never relate to wanting to move back in for the savings until you've experienced the financial hardships so I can't really tell you what to do. You stay, you save but miss out on independence. You leave, obviously it's vice versa.
I don't know that I've known many 21 year olds (let alone 34 year olds) who are debt free and have savings so either way, I think you'll do just fine.
DakinechicK
Active Member
Well, since I seem to have been the last one to get this memo, I decided that everybody pretty much said everything I wanted to say. I guess I can add a few more things though....
I moved out when I was 18 to a completely different state from my family. I had some rough times for sure, but I pulled through and love where I am today. I definitely learned a lot in a short amount of time about taking care of myself and basically how to survive and thrive without help from my parents. Sometimes looking back, I probably should have stayed with my parents for a longer amount of time, but I don't think I would be the woman I am today had I stayed. I probably wouldn't know most of the things I know now. There is definitely growing up to do when you move out on your own but you seem pretty well put together already. Of course nobody can tell you what to do, but I can tell you a girl isn't down with a man living with his parents LoL, though you shouldn't base your decision on that, obviously.
If you get along well with your parents then I see no harm in staying a while longer to save up more money and build your credit. The more money you save, the better you will be in the long run. I moved away with about 2k in my pocket and pretty good credit, and 11 years later I'm still in this wonderful state and am loving what I got goin' on! Good luck with whatever you choose! Living on your own is SO boss!!
I moved out when I was 18 to a completely different state from my family. I had some rough times for sure, but I pulled through and love where I am today. I definitely learned a lot in a short amount of time about taking care of myself and basically how to survive and thrive without help from my parents. Sometimes looking back, I probably should have stayed with my parents for a longer amount of time, but I don't think I would be the woman I am today had I stayed. I probably wouldn't know most of the things I know now. There is definitely growing up to do when you move out on your own but you seem pretty well put together already. Of course nobody can tell you what to do, but I can tell you a girl isn't down with a man living with his parents LoL, though you shouldn't base your decision on that, obviously.
If you get along well with your parents then I see no harm in staying a while longer to save up more money and build your credit. The more money you save, the better you will be in the long run. I moved away with about 2k in my pocket and pretty good credit, and 11 years later I'm still in this wonderful state and am loving what I got goin' on! Good luck with whatever you choose! Living on your own is SO boss!!
@Parcho: I'm not trying to politicalize at all, and also off topic, but I feel for you guys down there. Holy! A heart attack up here costs nothing, except the opportunity lost by being off for those weeks.
@MC: housing costs here resemble Redondo, and I'm happy for folks who live in affordable markets. I think for the sake of getting some, you should move out.
Financial advice: Figure up your monthly outgoing bills... say its $1000 to make the math easy. You ideally want 6-8 months of income saved in an emergency fund for when life decides you're next. on a $1600/month income, that means you will want at least $9600.00 in a SEPARATE emergency fund account. Not your savings account. This emergency fund account is for JUST emergencies, not for when "oh crap im out of groceries".
Now when you do move out, get rid of the "I don't spend money on fun" concept. I don't personally know you but I'd be willing to bet that you will spend money on fun. Whether it's finding a girl and having to meet her needs and do dinner once a week or a movie here and there or if you just make new friends in the apartment complex.
I do agree with that if you do not move out you are of course missing some of life's experiences. It's hard for me to see much of that truth because I'm not a father yet but my mother says it all the time, "You don't learn until you experience it yourself. Just telling you to save your money and expect the unexpected only gets you so far."
All in all, I'm sure you have a great family and that they will be behind you no matter what. Like I said before, I moved out and thought it was great! I also moved back in the next year. Life will hit you and I think that while you do still have a family there for you, it might be the time to move out and taste life since you always have a fallback plan, your family.
Either way, good luck with everything! There ARE books out there to help you manage life and finances if you need them. Attend a local seminar if you are looking for some people's life stories and ways they've survived. Been there done that and it was GREAT info.
Now when you do move out, get rid of the "I don't spend money on fun" concept. I don't personally know you but I'd be willing to bet that you will spend money on fun. Whether it's finding a girl and having to meet her needs and do dinner once a week or a movie here and there or if you just make new friends in the apartment complex.
I do agree with that if you do not move out you are of course missing some of life's experiences. It's hard for me to see much of that truth because I'm not a father yet but my mother says it all the time, "You don't learn until you experience it yourself. Just telling you to save your money and expect the unexpected only gets you so far."
All in all, I'm sure you have a great family and that they will be behind you no matter what. Like I said before, I moved out and thought it was great! I also moved back in the next year. Life will hit you and I think that while you do still have a family there for you, it might be the time to move out and taste life since you always have a fallback plan, your family.
Either way, good luck with everything! There ARE books out there to help you manage life and finances if you need them. Attend a local seminar if you are looking for some people's life stories and ways they've survived. Been there done that and it was GREAT info.
Short answer: Stay at home.
A little longer.. Your highest priority seems to be building the business. You are working two jobs. Moving out on your own is also a time suck. So many things have to be done more often than you think, and how do you do them and work two jobs. If you have a good relationship with your parents stay until you are down to one job. Then take your time. I wish I could have stayed home a little longer.
Anson
You have the rest of your life to live on your own.
A little longer.. Your highest priority seems to be building the business. You are working two jobs. Moving out on your own is also a time suck. So many things have to be done more often than you think, and how do you do them and work two jobs. If you have a good relationship with your parents stay until you are down to one job. Then take your time. I wish I could have stayed home a little longer.
Anson
You have the rest of your life to live on your own.
So I may have missed if someone mentioned this, but I didn't see it so I will bring it up (be it the woman in me and all......)
The costs you have going on are all fine and dandy, however from the get go....unless the place you find is already furnished.....
Where will you sit to eat your breakfast/lunch/dinner? Everyone needs some kind of table and chair set up.
Couches and living room furniture are a good idea, even a small loveseat and a table.
I'm assuming you have bedroom furniture you'll be moving in with so you should be ok to sleep and have dressers and coat hangers in the least to deal with your clothing.
Vacuum cleaner, broom, something to clean the floors with - yes you will have to clean your place once in a while.
You will need basic start up things for the bathroom, towels, mats, soap holder/dispenser. Tubs never have big enough ledges to carry ALL your stuff, so you'll have to get a caddy to go over the shower head to hold shampoo, soap....
Small appliances for the kitchen, unless you just microwave and stovetop everything. A toaster oven is a good investment.
Things like this drive your start up cost of moving out. Food for thought....I'd figure it would be something common sense, but even when I first moved out got overwhelmed at all the "extras" I need to have and didn't think about.
The costs you have going on are all fine and dandy, however from the get go....unless the place you find is already furnished.....
Where will you sit to eat your breakfast/lunch/dinner? Everyone needs some kind of table and chair set up.
Couches and living room furniture are a good idea, even a small loveseat and a table.
I'm assuming you have bedroom furniture you'll be moving in with so you should be ok to sleep and have dressers and coat hangers in the least to deal with your clothing.
Vacuum cleaner, broom, something to clean the floors with - yes you will have to clean your place once in a while.
You will need basic start up things for the bathroom, towels, mats, soap holder/dispenser. Tubs never have big enough ledges to carry ALL your stuff, so you'll have to get a caddy to go over the shower head to hold shampoo, soap....
Small appliances for the kitchen, unless you just microwave and stovetop everything. A toaster oven is a good investment.
Things like this drive your start up cost of moving out. Food for thought....I'd figure it would be something common sense, but even when I first moved out got overwhelmed at all the "extras" I need to have and didn't think about.